Friday, August 8, 2008

On What I'll Look Like With Glasses Perched On My Nose ...

Internet, it's been so long ...

Yesterday I visited the eye doc. He told me that my prescription had changed only slightly and that my eyes look generally healthy. Except when I told him that my eyes were more blurry and tired lately, he told me that they just needed a little help from the strain I put on them all day. Oh, okay. What help can I give them? To which he responded, "BIFOCALS."

Oh sweet Jesus.

Yep, I have to wear those glasses that sit on your nose for reading and computer work (which is generally ALL I EVER DO!). They remind me of my 6th grade science teacher who was probably a very sweet lady but she invoked the fear of death in us because of how serious those glasses made her look. She also had a chain that held them around her neck so that every now and again she could take them off and they would stay put around her neck. But she never did take them off so it just served to make her look even MORE serious and more witch-like. I think she reveled in the idea that no one would DARE forget that photosynthesis made plants green if she just looked the part of a witch and didn't have to invoke those powers against us.

Looking back, Ms. Breding was nothing but nice to us and I learned a great deal from her - including how to win points to earn some fruit roll-ups (another story). But the way she looked with those perched glasses never did leave me...

5 comments:

jdoc said...

She told my class that we shouldn't buy Crest toothpaste because the symbol on the side meant that they worshiped the devil. Only a witch could know that.

Anonymous said...

She used to work out at Curves, so I actually did get to see her once in a while.
MamaDoc

BDoc said...

I KNEW IT. SHE IS A WITCH!

I wonder if she bewitched the workout machines to make them run faster so she didn't have to work quite as hard. That's what I would do. I'd also bewitch the scale so I didn't know how little work I was doing.

cdoc said...

She was one of my favorite teachers! Always had fun in her class. Except when she tortured me by making me sit at a table with my arch-nemesis, a boy that loved to tell me that girls were weak and whales should all be dead. Brilliant on her part, but very wicked now that I think of it... definately a witch!

Anonymous said...

I did not think that you all had her for a teacher.